You are here

Recipe for When You're Worried Your Friend Is Mad At You

March 15, 2014
Emma Brodie

She says everything is okay, but she's short, avoiding eye contact, and doing that enforcer thing with her arms where she folds them without tucking in her hands... bottom line is, she's mad. You want to make it right, but you have no idea what you did.


It feels awful when your friend is acting like she's upset with you, especially if you don't know why. Let's back it up and see if we can't get to the bottom of this.

Yield: 1 serving diffused mental anguish


1 cup patience

½ cup interpersonal knowledge

2 lbs space

1 lb kindness

2 tbsp awareness

1 tsp reality

zen to taste


Begin by lining pan with a baseline of reality. All you know for a fact is that she's mad about something, and she's not talking about it.

Dump space in mixing bowl and set to churn. Fold in patience and slow mixer to lowest setting. She's telling you with her actions that she needs distance. As frustrating as it is that she won't just tell you what's going on, respect the warning signs and take a step back.

In a separate bowl, melt awareness until soft. How much of her reaction is about you and how much of it is about the fact that you're making everything about you when she just wants to be left alone?

Add in interpersonal knowledge and whisk until blended to the consistency of perspective. Feed perspective into larger mixing bowl and blend. What else is going on in her life that could be causing her stress?

Pour batter in pan and sprinkle zen on top. Bake until mixture has risen. The truth is when you screw up, you know you screwed up. If you can't think of what you did wrong, chances are it was nothing and you are caught in the crossfire of something outside your purview.

Allow cake sufficient time to cool off before attempting to remove from the pan. You're not crazy -- clearly something is bothering her. But it's in both of your best interests to wait for her to come to you when she's ready.

Frost with kindness. It's when people act the worst that they are in the most need. Letting her know you're there for her is the best thing you can do right now. The rest is up to her.

What "recipe" do you cook up when you're having a problem in a relationship? Share in the comments below!